Refine Poem for Private Message

I’ve already penned the verses below, and now I want them polished into a single, seamless romantic message I can share privately with someone special. The feelings must stay intact—tender, genuine, and personal—yet I’d like the rhythm tightened, the language smoothed, and any awkward phrasing refined so every line flows naturally.

If you have a knack for love-letter wording or poetic editing, this should be a quick but satisfying task. I’ll provide the current draft in full; you’ll return:

• A final, polished version ready to send
• (Optional) A concise alternate of no more than two lines in case I need something shorter

Please attach one or two samples of similar work so I can be sure our styles align.